Staying Afloat Unemployed

Last Friday marked the three month anniversary of my husband's last day at the Boeing Company after having received a layoff notice. Despite due diligence in a job search, he continues to be unemployed. Here is what has happened in the last three months:

(1) Due to provisions in the contract between the SPEEA union and the Boeing Company, under which my husband was working, Boeing has continued to pay for our medical insurance--up until now. We just received a bill for $1,373.91 to be paid by September 1, for one month's health insurance premiums. But I will have more to say about that later.

(2) We have been receiving about half of our former income in the form of a weekly check from the Employment Security Department of Washington State (commonly called an "unemployment check"). By using food from storage and cutting back, we have managed to get by on these checks by supplementing them with 200 dollars per week from our savings account. Our savings are still in good shape.

(3) Mental-health-wise, this has been a good season for me. I seem to have finally settled on the right combination of medications, and having my best friend husband spend every day with me has been wonderful, as well. Because of savings and food storage (thank you, Prophets of God) and a good worker's contract (thank you, union and company) and unemployment checks (thank you, legislators), we have not had worries this summer and have been able to enjoy the time together, taking walks, grocery shopping, watching a favorite television series, and sitting at the beach, tossing pebbles into the water. It has been a very healing time for me, and I have been more and more able to function like I used to. It has been a time of Peace.

(4) With continuing assistance from state and federal programs, we will be able to subsist on our savings and food storage for six months more, while my husband goes to college for the first time. He is all signed up. His tuition will be paid by the State of Washington.

Our savings are depleting, but should last for another six months, despite the jump in medical insurance costs. This is because our insurance premiums will not be as high as indicated by the statement we received in the mail last week. As part of the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (ARRA), which was signed into law by President Obama on February 17, 2009 as part of the Economic Stimulus Package, we are entiled to COBRA premium assistance.

COBRA (the Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act of 1985) made it possible for workers to keep their health insurance after layoffs by paying their premiums out-of-pocket. ARRA cuts the costs of those COBRA payments by two thirds. The bottom line is, we need pay only 35% of our total insurance premium for each of the next six months. (A thank you to the President and Congress.) We have already sent our first check for $480.87, and we have just enough left in our savings account to do that five more times.

(5) Our hope is that husband can stay in school and complete a two-year degree in business management. The next six months look good. After that, we will see what Father has as our next surprise. His plan for us is certainly working out so far. (A call back to Boeing would sure be nice, I think.)

A thank you to lapstrake for the photograph.

Divine Design

"Now, as you and I look at our lives . . . , we sometimes do not understand that through which we are passing, but, being submissive, we can trust Him.

"The day will come, brothers and sisters, when the tapestry of your life will be unfolded, and you will see divine design all though it, and praise God for the experience and the tutoring which, in His goodness, He has given you"

(Neal A. Maxwell, "Willing to Submit" [address given at BYU-Hawaii devotional, 9 Feb. 1988, p.8).

A thank you to Whatknot for sharing this photo on flickr.

Like a Submissive Child

"Those who submit like a child do it because they know that the Father wants only the happiness of His children and that only He knows the way. That is the testimony we must have to keep praying like a submissive child, in the good times as well as the times of trouble.

"With that faith, we will be able to pray for what we want and appreciate whatever we get."

--Elder Henry B. Eyring of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in Conference Report, October 2001 or Ensign November 2001

With thanks to Collin Key for sharing this photo on flickr.

Simplify

Winter - simplified :), originally uploaded by randihausken.

"In our search to obtain relief from the stresses of life, may we earnestly seek ways to simplify our lives."

--Elder L. Tom Perry of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Ensign, November 2008, pg 10.

A thank you to randihausken for sharing this photo on flickr.

"The Blessing of the Blackberry Bush"

“The Saints should always remember that God sees not as man sees; that he does not willingly afflict his children, and that if he requires them to endure present privation and trial, it is that they may escape greater tribulations which would otherwise inevitably overtake them. If He deprives them of any present blessing, it is that he may bestow upon them greater and more glorious ones by-and-by.”

--Elder George Q. Cannon, as cited in the story linked below.

Those who know me best will not be surprised when I confess that
this story resonated deeply with me when I read it in this month's Ensign magazine.

It is always encouraging for me to remember the purposefulness of thorns.

See more from Greg Newbold, the artist who illustrated the story for the Ensign, here.

The Truth About Perfection

Ready to fly (II)
Originally uploaded by marcelgermain

"Perfection is pending.
It can come in full only
after the Resurrection
and only through the Lord."

Elder Russell M. Nelson
General Conference
September -October 1995

(Italics added.)

A thank you to marcelgermain for sharing this photo on flickr.

Repost: A Reminder

Sunday, September 7, 2008

"Painful Things Happen Even to the Pure"

"To those who stagger or stumble, He is there to steady and strengthen us. In the end He is there to save us, and for all this He gave His life. However dim our days . . . may seem, they have been a lot darker for the Savior of the world. As a reminder of those days, Jesus has chosen . . . to retain for the benefit of His disciples the wounds in His hands and in His feet and in His side--signs, if you will, that painful things happen even to the pure and perfect; signs, if you will, that pain in this world is not evidence that God doesn't love you; signs, if you will, that problems pass and happiness can be ours . . . It is the wounded Christ who is captain of our souls, He who yet bears the scars of our forgiveness, the lesions of His love and humility, the torn flesh of obedience and sacrifice.

These wounds are the principal way we are to recognize Him when He comes."

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland
CES Conference at BYU
8 August 2000

A thank you to midiman for sharing this photograph on flickr.

Nearer to God than you Think

will
Originally uploaded by zachstern

President Harold B. Lee once remarked:
"Don't be afraid of the testing and trials of life. sometimes when you are going through the most severe tests, you will be nearer to God than you have any idea . . . "
(In Conference Report, Munich Germany Area conference, 1973, 114.) [Ensign February 2009]

Thank you to zachstern for sharing this photograph on flickr.

Tapestries of the Divine

"Now, as you and I look at our lives . . . we sometimes do not understand that through which we are passing, but, being submissive, we can trust Him.

"The day will come, brothers and sisters, when the tapestry of your life will be unfolded, and you will see divine design all through it, and praise God for the experience and the tutoring which, in His goodness, He has given you" (Neal A. Maxwell, "Willing to Submit" [address given at BYU-Hawaii devotional, 9 Feb. 1988, p.8).

A thank you to SullyT64Photography for the picture.

The One

"Some are lost because they are different. They feel as though they don’t belong. Perhaps because they are different, they find themselves slipping away from the flock. They may look, act, think, and speak differently than those around them and that sometimes causes them to assume they don’t fit in. They conclude that they are not needed.

"Tied to this misconception is the erroneous belief that all members of the Church should look, talk, and be alike. The Lord did not people the earth with a vibrant orchestra of personalities only to value the piccolos of the world. Every instrument is precious and adds to the complex beauty of the symphony. All of Heavenly Father’s children are different in some degree, yet each has his own beautiful sound that adds depth and richness to the whole.

"This variety of creation itself is a testament of how the Lord values all His children. He does not esteem one flesh above another, but He 'inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; . . . all are alike unto God.'”--Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, Conference, April 2008

Thank you to Breathez for pointing out this touching quote. See the entire article here.
Show Off
Originally uploaded by nickwheeleroz

A Thank you to nickwheeleroz for sharing this photograph on flickr.com.

Litmus

PH eddies in a litmus solution
Originally uploaded by gever tulley

"Why did the Lord ask such things of Abraham? Because, knowing what his future would be . . . he was determined to test him. God did not do this for His own sake; for He knew by His foreknowledge what Abraham would do; but the purpose was to impress upon Abraham a lesson, and to enable him to attain unto knowledge that he could not obtain in any other way. That is why God tries all of us. It is not for His own knowledge; for He knows all things beforehand. He knows all your lives and everything you will do. But he tries us for our own good, that we may know ourselves."

(George Q. Cannon, in Conference Report, April 1899, 66).

Thank you to gever tulley for sharing this photograph, "PH eddies in a litmus solution," on flickr.

Accomodations in Church

Some handicaps are obvious to the casual observer. For mental illness, however, the needs of the afflicted one may not be apparent. Here is the way one fellow-sufferer, whose letter is shared here with permission, helped others to understand her unique challenges regarding her church calling.

"I've been thinking a lot about my calling in primary. I guess I feel obligated to tell you (and the presidency via this email that I am sending to you), that I have great doubts about my ability to be a stable teacher for the kids in my class. I LOVE the kids. They are great, but I feel emotionally overwhelmed each Sunday, and it is starting to effect my performance as a teacher in primary, as well as my feelings of well being and peace in other areas of my life.

"I have bi-polar disorder, as well as ADD. I take medication daily for each of the disorders. One of the saving graces in my life is that I can take care of my son, and that my Sundays are uplifting and relaxing. It helps my emotions and spirit prepare for the following weeks trials, which will inevitably come as I try to balance my bi-polar and ADD characteristics while taking care of my son and the housework.

"A majority of the symptoms I feel from my disorders are a high level of anxiety and having a low stress tolerance. There are some things I do with ease, but there are some things that cause me a great deal of stress and anxiety that is beyond my control and ability to stop. I take medication to keep my anxiety under control but it doesn't prevent all anxiety and stress from occurring, otherwise I'd be a vegetable.

"Primary causes a lot of stress, and my auto reaction to that stress is to emotionally shut down. Usually, that means I just stay in my apartment where I can be at peace and control my environment. As much as I love the kids in primary, primary itself is a major stress point for me. I may look cool on the outside, but on the inside I am high in anxiety and feeling depressed.

"I know that each person has unique challenges and trials, and I really hate to ever back down from a challenge, especially when that challenge involves a church calling, but for the sake of the children, I feel you should know that I do not think I will have the fortitude or the mental capacity to deal with my class every Sunday. It may be much more helpful to rotate with a teacher each Sunday so I do not have to be in class and primary every week. I fear if we do not take some sort of action, then the children will suffer because of my inability to be reliable and consistent.

"I want to do what the Lord has asked me to do, and I also feel the desire to serve. Coming to terms with the fact that I cannot handle everything given to me is difficult for me to admit. I don't like admitting I have a disability, or that I have certain limitations because I am a perfectionist, but I am trying to be realistic so that you know where I am coming from and the kids in my class can benefit fully from the primary program."

Perhaps this example will help you with your particular challenges. I know that it has helped me. Thank you, E, for sharing this.

Thank you to g.originals for sharing the above photograph in Creative Commons on flickr.

Burdens and Blessings

Heavy burden
Originally uploaded by villoks

"But the tests of life are tailored for our own best interests, and all will face the burdens best suited to their own mortal experience. In the end we will realize that God is merciful and that all the rules are fair. We can be reassured that our challenges will be the ones we needed, and conquering them will bring blessings we could have received in no other way."

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland
Ensign, October 2006, 15

Thank you to villoks for sharing this photograph on flickr.

The Healing of the Spirit

". . . whatever Jesus lays his hands upon lives. If Jesus lays his hands upon a marriage, it lives. If he is allowed to lay his hands on the family, it lives."
(Elder Howard W. Hunter of the Council of the Twelve, 1979.)

"Accept the healing of spirit that He alone can give."
(First Presidency Christmas Message 1985.)


When my father died, I realized that, despite the illness that took his life, in all the essential matters he had in reality been healed. Cancer prevailed in the ravaging of his body, to be sure, but I was witness also to the undeniable healing of soul which had taken place for him. Through the process of battling cancer, relationships with family members were healed, as well as Dad's relationship with his Heavenly Father. For the first time in my life, I heard my earthly father declare his faith in Jesus Christ. Was not that a healing of profound significance? I held his hand as he passed from this life, peaceful in the knowledge that all was well.

Too quickly, I believe, we despair that someone has not been healed, solely because they remain ill in their body. My experience has been that physical illness can be a means for the healing of the spirit within.

In my own case, I have prayed for years to be blessed with the gift of charity. I have been willing to experience whatever was needful for me to obtain that gift. I am not surprised that it is taking a lot of illness to open me up to the reception of so great an endowment.

Now I am feeling charity growing in me, as well as an increased trust in the Lord. I have prayed also to be able to say "thy will be done" and really, truly, to the depth of my soul mean what I am saying, because I truly trust in God. Those being my desires, they are worthy of suffering whatever is necessary to obtain them, are they not? To me, they most certainly are.

Please Don't Label Me "Inactive"

burnham lighthouse
Originally uploaded by g r e e n g a g e

As members of the Church we are sometimes inclined to place labels on others. The world needs to be a place of order, and I guess things seem more orderly when people are placed in categories and stamped with labels. Some of these labels might be “inactive,” “nonmember,” “active,” “single,” “divorced,” “uninterested,” “smoker,” “drinker,” and so on. May I suggest that there is a very real danger in applying these labels to people? It is altogether too easy to forget that each man, woman, boy, and girl on the face of the earth is a child of our Father in Heaven and entitled to the same blessings as we are. If we study the life of the Savior, we find that he was very hesitant to label his brothers and sisters as publicans, sinners, or adulterers. There can be no doubt that, as a perfect man, he was all too well aware of the sin in this world. Yet he was able to condemn the sin while at the same time loving and caring for the sinner. It is interesting to me to note that the one label that he did apply was that of “hypocrite.” Are there any of us who are so free from sin that we can afford to categorize others? Let us be careful to view our brothers and sisters as sons and daughters of God with great potential and to care for them accordingly.--Elder Ballard (Click here to see the entire article.)

An understanding friend of mine recently asked me, "So, are you inactive, or do you just not attend church?" I replied that I am not inactive. I still do all the things that I have done for years: study the scriptures each day, pay tithing, pray. Most importantly, I feel the Holy Spirit guiding me, and I feel my Savior's love and approval. I simply cannot attend any meetings right now, and that is because of my illness. Being the great friend that she is, she trusted that I spoke the truth.

Interestingly, I see aspects of my Patriarchal Blessing being fulfilled now as never before. I know that my light has not gone out. I hope I am serving, although I am unable to accept any formal calling.

I know that we all need to let our lights shine. Perhaps others could think of me--and of others in similar situations--as just a different type of lighthouse.

(Thank you to adamclutterbuck.com for the picture. Click on the photo for credits.)

Recommended: Me!

It was very tough waiting among other people, and all I could do was cry when the Stake President came and shook my hand and asked kindly how I was doing. But I had my second interview last night. The counselor to the Stake President was very understanding.

I have my new Temple Recommend. I feel so much the love of the Lord. I am very blessed.


Thank you to this photographer for the beautiful picture.