One Broken Off: Anxiety

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Anxiety

I drove one-and-a-half miles through our lovely community to drop my son at work this morning. Then I drove the one-and-a-half miles back. By the time I got home I was shaking with anxiety, and I went upstairs and cried. It was so hard.

(Not ready to return to church yet.)

Thank you to this artist/photographer for the representation of what I am feeling.

1 comment:

Kelli said...: Oh, I am so sorry. Take care. Even though it was only 1.5miles, its a small baby set, even though you cried, its still a day you can remember getting out. The new meds will kick in and one or two baby steps at a time. Love you; April 20, 2008 at 8:28 PM

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One Mental Illness: Bipolar 2

This is the best description of my own Bipolar II symptoms which I have found to date. Here is the link to the full article. (To my loved ones: please be aware that I am on several helpful medications. I am not feeling suicidal.)

Hypomanic Episodes: Hypomania is a mild version of mania where the symptoms are the same [as bipolar I] but are less intense – they only need to last four days and do not significantly impair a person’s functioning. Many people find they are more productive and have positive social interactions when hypomanic. Others find that although a single hypomanic episode does not cause much impairment, repeated episodes negatively affect finances, social relationships, and/or work performance.

Major Depressive Episodes (MDEs): Depression is the down state when people feel sad or blue, or simply cannot enjoy anything. This state tends to be characterized by changes in sleep, appetite and weight, energy, and cognitive (thinking) abilities. People may feel worthless and guilty, and may consider suicide.

Major depressive episode is defined as a period of at least two weeks with five or more of the following symptoms:

o Depressed mood and/or anhedonia (an inability to take pleasure in things, or greatly diminished interest in activities usually enjoyed)

and

o A decrease or increase in appetite; weight loss or gain

o Sleep disturbance (insomnia or hypersomnia)

o Feeling physically slowed down or physically restless

o Fatigue or loss of energy

o Feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt

o Difficulty concentrating or making decisions

o Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide